It sure did hit me...  

Posted by Neru

For so many years, I'm living like a hermit crab, a sole spirit that travels from one place to another, a grasshopper that hops every moment he's taunted

I wonder why most of the people around me never makes me feel important? or is it just? is it just me that is being selfish or is it just me that wants acceptance?

And now, I'm a young adult, supposedly mature and should be able to work things out well; honed by the harshness of life, I'm still an innocent being, no one knows I'm still in my darkest days.

Still searching for who I really am, I met different people, some fixed me, most broke me.

I guess the "I wanted to fit in" feeling is set to be with me forever.


:) thank you,


-Neil Evangelista

The Reason Behind Neglection  

Posted by Neru

have you ever thought of being in a crowd with varieties fo personality?

ever misplaced your true self just to be accepted by the people around you?;
or tried to be somebody, well at least somebody is better, right?

felt in a dark room, your eyes open but all you can see is darkness?

your staring nowhere, thinking blurred and hazy?

heavyness kills, solitary amplifies and friends dies.

you're searching for light, but all you can see is black.

ever recorded a black light? not yet? now you do.

acceptance where are you?

family?

friends?

such non-sense.

They won't feed you, they'll just make your life miserable, they will ruin you and just dump you.

they're not important,


"BUT"

they can help you,

they can help you realize that you're wrong, after all these years, you're wrong, but somehow right.

cluttered with uncertainties?

your cognitive process is already leaving you with errors?

why don't you just wait?

wait.

wait..

wait...

until total darkness eats you,

be an earth,

feel the shivering deluge of pain,

after that, you're done...

done with everything..

done with the harshness of the world..

done...done...done...

Lived alone? died Alone...

A Midnight Peril  

Posted by Neru

Well, I'll just have to update my blog site, and I'm done, I guess.

Actually last night, during my special moment, the time where in my thinking skill is maximized, remembering things and stuffs that happened, I end up focusing my concentration in an event that took most of the moment.

I was walking in a dim lit area to visit a friend, as soon as I step my right foot on the stiff and trap like one way street, I remembered a rumor that made my eyes roll around clockwise.

I heard an old hag beside a store just near our place telling the townspeople something creepy, that every night at exactly 11:59 pm where today and tomorrow swap places, you can hear a squeaking sound and a water drop in the area even in the middle of concretes and dry air terrain.

A street light turning on and off, and a silhouette shadow of a man smoking.

A cold thin dry air and a BANG!!!

A man suddenly fell and moan as if begging for help.

Then you will hear whispers of foot steps, and as you go on, it keeps on getting louder and louder
and a breeze will run through your face and someone will tap behind you in the middle of darkness.

And you will turn around and will hear a bouncing sound, but it sure doesn't sound like a ball of air, but it is a bouncing sound.

stunned because of the unusual sound, you will again turn around to continue your errand.

Exactly parallel to the area where you saw a shadow of a man smoking under the street lamp, a sound of a young girl got you're attention. A cute sound of "PSSSssst" got you. the girl whispers "here sir, here, quick!".

Felt astonished hearing a sound in the middle of a deserted street, standing there in a minute or two, made you're stunned soul quite relaxed.

Almost on the other side of the street, you saw the garbage container shake. "How come it shook without any life forms in it?" you asked yourself...

Then finally, I managed to get through the street seeing my friend in front of the their home's door and I asked him, "Why are you outside?" and "why do you have those bruises on your knee and elbow?". then he said, I was looking for my cat, I bet he's scavenging for food somewhere, then my mother told me to look for my little sister because our uncle took him to buy candies but she usually wants to play hide and seek, then my dad asked me to buy cigarette for him and I suddenly stepped on a black rubber like thing and fell down, where I got these bruises.

"So what are you doing here?" my friend asked me; I was just going to visit you and borrow a book from you, "this late night?" he said, Yeah, so what do you have in their? i asked.

then we entered their house...




___Kinda Corny___ hahahaha

Letters.  

Posted by Neru


dear they,
i see you now have lots of friends... I noticed a lot of improvements in your personality than of the last time i saw you,., You've improved a lot... i knew you would be ready to face the world,,, you're now well equipped with expriences from the past... and well molded by the harsh way the world have tested you... I'm expecting a lot... and please be ready for everything... i wish you success and happiness... thank you for leaving me...thanks for the memories by the way,., im afraid I can no longer jive with the way how you rule your world... thanks for dropping by...
dear them,
after a promise and an agreement of being connected... you will just leave me.,. staring and thinking of someday i can also be in your company... But then... look at me now,,, I can be as cruel and as evil as i can be... because of you...them... you left me without any choice,,, whenever i see you... I realized... i should have thought of changing the world and making it my own... Thank you for making me this miserable... thank you for pulling off the needles and putting on knives in exchange... I hope someday I can do the same to you...
dear us,
we share almost the same world... we laugh on almost all jokes we utter... we smile together... we eat together... we make our histories almost at the same time... thank you... but i think.. everything has its ending... someday... stories will be just stories,,, memories shall remain memories... we must take different paths to fully explore the world,.. then time shall come...we may gather and complete the book of history of our company... but today... we shall part... and soon we shall reunite... make each and everyone of us proud...
dear me,,,
Since you've experienced a lot... you've been hurt a lot... I'm sure you're ready to face regrets,,, leave them as they leave you... hurt them... or take everything away from them... besides they already took a lot from you... your happiness... your joy.. and your chances of knowing other more deserving people than them.. they don't deserve your best... all they deserve is your vengeance... your anger and your worst...
to your friends... give them your heart... make them proud as they do the same for you... live with them even if you're far from each other... love them for they do the same for you... hurt them if it's necessary to build stronger foundation... but be careful.. someday... they might leave you... they might betray you... but be positive,... they will also love you in return...
to the passengers... in and out they go...
With love,
You...

PaRokYanO ( buhay mo, buhay ko, at sila)  

Posted by Neru





maduming kalye… mga kalat sa tabi-tabe,.. ilan lamang yan sa makikita kapag naglakad sa mga lansangang halos limutin na ng sibilisasyon… napag-iwanan na ng teknolohiya’t mabilis na takbo ng panahon…
mabahong usok ng makina… masikip na upuang walang lamesa… mainit at masungit na ulo ng drayber na sumasabay sa maalinsangang pakiramdam ng panahon… mga pang araw-araw na pamumuhay ng mga motorista’t pasahero…
maingay na mga bata… mga nanay na walang magawa… mga nagbi-bingo sa tapat ng tindahan ni aling kwan… mga asong nagpapabahuan ng etchas …mga pusang kinakati at naghahanap ng kakamot dito… mga baryong simple… at mga taong mukang kung anu lang…
nagmamadaling mga tao… maraming anino na kung saan saang dako tutungo… mga papeles na walang katapusan… mga xerox na walang hangganan… buhay sa opisinang malamig at mga estudyanteng di alam ang kahahantungan sa hinaharap…
naglalakihang mga alahas… nag-gagandahang mga palamuting rosas… mga gayak na out-of-this world… at mga lenggwaheng banyaga kahit di naman halata… mga Eba na nakabingwit ng malaking isda sa pusod ng Maynila…
isang dangkal na tela simula bewang… mga koloreteng sana naging maskara na lang… damit na tinipid sa tela at ayan sexy na.. mga ilaw at tugtuging mapang-aliw sa mga Ebang may buntot… at mga Adan na naghahanap ng Eba na parausan… sa pusod ng Malate matatagpuan at maging sa iba pang lugar na maraming Bahay Libangan…
Tahimik… Mapayapa… ngunit sa likod ay may bandilang itim na naka dapa… Mga kamay na nakaharap sa itaas… mga matang nakatingin sa paa ng bawat isa… mga tugtuging mapang halina… banal, oo banal nga…
humingi ka ng kapatawaran sa rebultong nasa iyong harapan… magsabi ng kasalanan sa taong makasalanan din naman… lumuhod… umiyak… malinis ka na sa iyong kaibuturan…
pumili… pumanig… tumangkilik… saang lugar… anong landas… kahit anu pa man… parokyanong kang matatawag…

AYALA,, MAKATI.... rALLy  

Posted by Neru






AYALA, MAKATI City... rally






























Pictures... (rally)  

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Rally in Mendiola